Turtlenecks: Your Winter Wardrobe's Silent Partner

by Ryan

Elon Musk, Batman, Michael Jordan and Lionel Messi all have something in common.  No, they don’t all go to the same Trader Joe's.  Think about it...each one is some sort of front man.  Batman got all the credit for karate chopping bad guys.  Elon Musk receives the adulation for Tesla’s latest long-shot public evaluation. MJ is often thought to be the sole reason the Malone and Stockton-led Jazz will permanently have the Jordan crying meme next to their name.  

The fact is, no one ever thinks of the silent enforcers of a partnership.  Alfred never gets the respect he deserves for dealing with how pissy Bruce Wayne gets after realizing that he, himself, designed a bat-suit without the ability to turn your neck without turning your whole body.  Horace Grant never gets shouted out at the function for never missing a 15-footer in crunch-time.  Does the ownership team at Tesla receive any fist pumps for sending a “jp” mass text to their investors after Elon drunkenly proclaims he wants to send the first self steering gyro cart to space? No.

You know what else gets noooo love...the turtleneck!! A solid turtleneck is Ivan Rakitic allowing Messi to roam the pitch wherever the hell he wants, when he wants. Your new trench coat needs something to allow it to be as reckless as possible without offending the wine and cheese crowd.  Whether you feel like stepping out in a vintage 70’s sherpa coat or a Jil Sander deconstructed blazer, the turtleneck is there for you.  It is the MVP calmly explaining to the Uber driver that you meant no ill will by kicking his car door shut while yelling out the only line you know of that Lil Uzi Vert song.   

With that blatant disrespect shown to the turtleneck in mind, I feel it's my duty to share these 10 inspiring looks from around the interwebs.   Some feature classic, lightweight versions under eye catching outerwear and others are stand alone giants in their own right.  Either way, the next time you come across a righteous coat over a rollneck, stop and salute it for doing its job without the need for props.  


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